So my last post was me underneath a dryer, getting my hair done. Yeah needless to say it turned out green & im going to try to go back to my original girl, who just happens to be my ex sister in law. Which was why it was suggested to me to try someone else. And well like I thought, that went down the pooper! Anywho, I could give two cruds about hair right now. I’m in a funk y’all. Anywho, Christmas has came & gone. It was amazing. We had Christmas in our new house, even though our move in date was delayed. It was an absolute blessing! New Years has came & gone. My grandparents kept our babies & let us have a night out. Which ended, sober & in bed before 1:30! We are real party animals!😂
So like I said I’m in a funk. I keep praying about it. I’ve dealt with anxiety my entire life. Sometimes, I hardly notice it & other times it’s like inevitable. So in my previous post I wrote about my grandmother having cancer. Well she went to the doctor on Wednesday & they found another spot. Which means the doctor wants to do surgery to remove it all, which means taking out some of her stomach & intestines. She will be cut from her breast bone to her belly button. She’s in way better shape health wise than she was when she was diagnosed, so the doctor is more comfortable now. I’m not sure I’ve mentioned this, but my grandmother & I are super close. She’s my best friend. The one I turn to for everything. I talk to her atleast 5 times a day, and we text none stop. I tell her legit everything! She is everything to me. She is in her 70’s and I just can’t lose her, y’all. I can’t. A part of me would literally die inside. I’m so scared. I’ve cried everyday since Wednesday. Without her or anyone else knowing, not even my husband. My anxiety is through the roof. Sometimes I can’t even think. I do not want her to have to continue her chemo shots every month, she hates them. They make her sick for days & so weak. So this surgery is the alternative. I know she’s scared but she has a strong relationship with God. She is so strong. I’m trying to be strong, and I am. Until I’m alone, and I just cry & cry. I’ve even done it once in front of my children, which I shouldn’t. But sometimes I can’t help it, and the little arms around my neck, make me feel alittle better.
We would appreciate prayers, and if you don’t believe in prayer, send good vibes! Prayers for the doctors, his staff, and for my grandma, to heal & get home fast!!! I love her so much.
Thanks in advance.